Boston is a Lame City Full of Lame People

My dear Warnie and The Boos,

As the title offers, Boston is a lame city, full of lame people. I'm not sure you've been keeping up with the current hysteria here in frozen yankeeville, but here goes. Yesterday it was reported that 10 mysterious packages, likely bombs or some sort of chemical/biological agent, were discovered around Boston. MSNBC, CNN, and FOX news were all over this story. Even NPR cautiously reported the possible end of civilization as we know it. Thanks to the miracles of modern technology, I can show you a picture of these devices.

Yes, it was the Moonites. Giving the finger.

Well, Boston deserved the finger. Not only was this just an advertising campaign composed of devices showing a cartoon character, the devices were "magnetic lights that pose no danger". Now, I'm not up on current terrorist chic, but I haven't seen much in the way of cartoon characters. Well, maybe Maoists, but definitely not Al-Qaeda, seeing as the Qu'ran isn't so comfortable with images anyway.

Oh, and to make Boston lamer, they're arresting the artists who put up the ad campaign. Now, this campaign existed in Boston; New York; Los Angeles; Chicago; Atlanta; Seattle; Portland; Austin; San Francisco; and Philadelphia. No where else had a problem with this! Probably because the people aren't, you guessed it, lame.

Since I know, Warnie, that you've looked at Something Positive, I know you at least have some idea about this problem, since Randy Milholland talks about it a fair amount. But it's frustrating to think that I'm dealing with the kind of mentality that would suppose that my poems amount to terrorist rhetoric simply because they don't understand what they mean. Heaven forbid I put blinking lights on my poems, they'd arrest me.

Sigh. Anyway, I thought I'd let you know I quit my job at the liquor store. I got tired of not being able to write as much as I wanted, and it was depressing me. So, I'm done. Partially I did it so I could interview Alistair MacLeod and drive him back up to Vermont after he does a reading here at UNH. His novel, No Great Mischief, is amazing. But mostly I was tired of doing something worthless, when I feel I can trust myself to contribute something of worth, whether with my writing or my time.

Speaking of writing, I have a poem due in 5 hours. I'm going to go and start clacking on the typewriter, and see if that theory about Hamlet is correct.

Take care, and don't move to Boston,

Jack